Although only 2’1” and 93 pounds, William Bean Roscoe P. Coltrane, known as “Willie Bean”, has been a nebular vortex of energy in the Coastal Alabama political scene. We found him in the Biergarten Am Chinesischen Turm in Munich last week, where he had accompanied Senator Richard Shelby in a effort “to discuss issues surrounding the global economic crisis and national security issues.” We should note that prior to the interview, Mr. Bean had consumed several dopplebock-soaked pretzels.

CA.TV:Mr. Bean, what have you been doing since your attempted run for mayor? Lobbying?
WBRPC: Lobbying would be a misrepresentation of my interests. I’ve been kitchening and living rooming since the Fairhope Mayoral Race. My food dish is in the kitchen and my dog bed is in the living room. I ponder a lot between the two. I sometimes do porching because it’s on the way outside, where I need to go once in awhile.

We’re pretty certain that we beat a few of the Fairhope Seven in 2008, and that, in itself, represents hope. Whether it’s ‘change in which we can believe’ (grammatically correct) or not, is uncertain. We’re currently weighing our options for seeking higher public office. I’m polling well in the precinct and I have strong support from a diverse group; dogs, cats, parakeets, you know, the obvious right wing conservative bunch. The squirrels seem uninterested.

CA.TV: We heard you may be interested in running for Jo Bonner’s seat in the U.S. House of Representatives – is this true?
WBRPC: We know that Mr. Bonner closely monitors the Dog Blog and is cherry picking some of our ideas. We have intelligence reports suggesting that our ‘Dog Rules’ may be adopted by not only Mr. Bonner but also by Senators Shelby and Sessions. That in itself, would represent a Willie Bean philosophical victory.

CA.TV: How old are you now?
WBRPC: As you may have already discovered, my age matters not. My ideas, however, are timeless. I’m connected with great thinking dogs of the ages. One really cool dog who hung with a metaphysical genius named Plato, told me that his friend Plato wrote words on paper; morning, noon and night. My friend (the dog), who doesn’t read, told me that he saw these words on papers named THE REPUBLIC. ‘A friend ought always to do good to a friend and never evil.’ Seems right to me.

CA.TV: Have your attorneys investigated whether the minimum age requirement for Congress (35 years old) is in dog or human years?
WBRPC: I have no attorney.

CA.TV: What party are you likely to caucus with?
WBRPC: Any party connected with Mardi Gras.

CA.TV: Any other comments?

WBRPC: I’m focused on well being and happiness for all, possibly the highest goal of all living things’ deliberate actions. Willie Bean for Governor! The Wisdom of Willie Bean Check out my blog if you haven’t already…blog.williebeanformayor.com.

CA.TV: We appreciate a V.I.D. (very important dog) such as yourself for taking time with CA.TV – a small, independent news source.